I have a very good friend, we'll call her Molly, and she's one of those friends who you can go months without talking to and pick up where you left off. I met her years ago through her now ex-husband. Her ex-husband had told me for years that Molly and I would get along great. When we met, we were instant friends. We've never lived in the same city, and most likely never will. We might see each other once a year, sometimes much less. We play phone tag a lot. We went a long time without talking until about 6 months ago. Since then, we've both been better about talking and keeping up with each other. Some of that is thanks to facebook, some of it is thanks to us being more diligent friends.
So, last Friday, Molly and I caught up on the phone. I knew that something bad had happened with the guy she had been dating. He is a friend of hers from college, a guy she's know for 15 years, and just recently reconnected with. Well, on Friday, February 13, they had gone to a concert and were driving home when he started hitting her. He beat the crap out of her, broke her nose, some ribs, and a couple of other bones in her face. He told her he was going to kill her and that no one would ever find her. It was completely out of nowhere. And it is terrifying.
Molly is doing ok, as ok as you can be when someone you love beats you to a pulp. She has good and bad moments. Physically, she's healing really well. I saw her a week after it happened and she looks so much better than I thought she would. I was so nervous to see her, and to react, in front of her, but she has taken good care of herself and you can tell. There are two court dates this week and I know they will be hard on her. I hope that the judicial system works and that he has some kind of punishment and/or rehabilitation. It's just not right that you can hurt someone that you care about in that way.
I've never doubted that domestic violence is a real thing. But, like everything else in life, it is all a different story when it happens to someone you know. It has a face that I know now. And it is so very frightening. Maybe Molly can look back on her relationship and piece together some warning signs. But how the heck do you know what to look for? How do you see the signs and get out before it's too late? I mean, he could have killer her. And it was completely out of nowhere. It's a really scary world out there and it makes me want to take all of the people I care about and crawl into a big hole away from the scariness.
